Health

We all have those friends that seem like they have their lives all figured out. They go through each day with their heads held high, exuding a confidence that we can’t seem to perfect ourselves. And somehow they make it look so easy.

Sometimes we can’t help but envy them. We know that growing up is all about finding ourselves and becoming the person we want to be for the rest of our lives. Yet there are still so many things we’re not sure about and sometimes we wake up feeling like we’ll never be like our self-assured friends.

It took some time for me to realize this, but my friends – the ones I thought were perfect –  are also struggling with their insecurities. They sometimes look in the mirror and see things that they don’t like about themselves. They have doubts about what the future holds and sometimes they’re not as confident as they may come off.

I don’t think anyone is one hundred percent sure of themselves. We are human, not robots. No one, and I mean no one, is perfect. So don’t beat yourself up if you’re not as confident as everyone around you appears to be. It’s okay to have insecurities. It’s okay to have bad days. Growing up is about finding yourself, but you don’t have to have everything figured out today or tomorrow or even in a year from now.

You do have to know one thing. And it is one of the most important things you will ever need to know. If someone hasn’t told you this already, I’m here to tell you that you are enough. You might have insecurities and doubts and you might not have everything figured out just yet but who you are right now, in this very moment, is enough. You don’t have to be anything more than what you already are. You don’t have to change anything about yourself, and you most certainly don’t have to be like who you think your friends are.

Everyone has their own struggles. Some just carry them a little better than others but, nonetheless, we all have a weight on our shoulders. If you just remember that you are enough, then that weight will get a little less heavy. Don’t worry about the things that you can’t change or even the things you have no control over. Having insecurities is not something to be ashamed of and being confident is not a quality that people are born with. You can feel like crap if you want to on some days. Just as long as you remember that those super confident friends that you have sometimes feel like crap too; just as long as you do this one thing for yourself:

On the days that you feel like you’re at your lowest, tell yourself that you are enough. Tell yourself that you don’t have to be anyone, other than who you are. It might not free you of all of the insecurities that you have, but it will make going through each day a little easier.

Image: Unsplash

Skills

Today you and I both made a decision. Thus far, today’s decisions have included my choosing to ignore my first alarm clock and wait for the next preset one three minutes later, running a red light while squealing in bliss guilt, and noteworthy progress in my decision to study abroad in Budapest. We are all aware that the decisions we make every day can either be major or minor and the more decisions we make, the more productive we are. And since they are a part of our daily lives, we must learn how to situate ourselves in a position that allows us to make the best decisions we can. Here are a few tips that may help!

1. Objectivity

Emotions take a huge part in our moods and sometimes, our decisions. This can many times fog what is really at stake. The best decisions are those made when there are no judgments or biases and when one is not in a position when his or her emotions are not heavily influencing the choices made. Making decisions in an emotional state may lead to regret later on. Try finding an outlet for emotions elsewhere and later returning to make a decision in a more rational state.

2. Take Your Precious Time

Quick means productive this day and age, and meeting deadlines means efficiency. However, in decision-making, especially with big ones, it is important to fully think out what it is you are choosing to do. More importantly, this means not rushing to conclusions and basing choices off of assumptions. Taking the time to fully analyze the possibilities is the best way to get results. If this means taking an extra day or two to take a look at things with a fresh mind, make arrangements and things will surely fall into place. It is better to take your time than to make hasty and rash decisions.

3. 360˚ POV

Although you may like to think you’re right most of the time, listening to all parts of the story, putting yourself in the shoes of others, and looking at all points of views help you rethink your position. Make sure that when making decisions, you are taking into consideration multiple points of view. This will allow you to see your potential paths. Not only will this call for smarter decisions, but it will also make for more confident ones.

4. Follow Your Gut

I’ve discerned that hunches are often underrated and overlooked. Many celebrities and successful businessmen have thanked their achievements to following their gut. There is a common misconception that “following your gut” means do what you feel, which is very much linked with emotions. However, there is a stark difference between the two. Following your gut is equivalent to following your instinct, which is very different than doing what your emotions want. As noted by Lisa Evans, a writer for Entrepreneur, you can verify if your choices are coming from emotion if you are feeling stressed, anxious, or worried. If not, then you are following your gut, which is something innate in all humans.

5. Make a List

How to not over-analyze? Although everyone says to never over-analyze a situation, they are, regrettably, inevitable sometimes. So, if you happen to be someone of this nature, the best way to structure your “over-analyzing” is by making a list. Jot down all of the pros and cons of making whatever decision you plan on taking and compare. Which makes more sense? Which is common sense? Which has more cons? Writing things down helps with objectivity and seeing things in another form.

Making decisions are a required part of our lives and sometimes making the right ones can be tricky. Hopefully you can find yourself embracing a few of these tips when in a dilemma. How will you approach your next decision?

Image: Julia Mazerova